I fuck myself over. That dark night, laying in his little, carved out space of blankets. He turned the lights off, 'no fancy dimmers here,' he thought. Then to undress me, bit by bit, you read fucking poems to me! Everything we did was so fantastical. Each fight, each kiss was like a director screamed, "TAKE TWO!" and we gave it our all. I miss your silly face. My puppy dog with slender body. I would collapse in you all the time! I loved you so much. I've buried it all so I don't have to think about it too much. I don't know how we were so locked into each other. You still make me your world and I remember that night, coming home to you on my couch. Starting the adventure together and all spirits high. Did this all really happen? I jumped on you, you woke from sleep, the history channel glaring blue on your cheeks. I kissed you all over, I could eat your face. Knowing you was like an alternate universe. where does this leave us for the rest?