Father

The 4 agreements. Maybe he's actually right. It seems pretty ridiculous to me but at this point, I'll give them a try. The thing is, it's hard to hear someone like my father say that people are capable of change. He has been the same for so many years and I haven't seen much growth. If he thinks he has changed, then we are all really in the shitter. Sometimes, he surprises me with his warmth. Last night, in the cold, we sat out front of Sinai hospital on one of the benches and did not speak. I never know what to say to him. I think I'd probably just like to scream. He always asks the same questions because he doesn't know how else to get me to speak. My favorite is, "So...who are you hanging out with these days?". No one dad, next question?

And then I got upset at her...and I've got to apologize.

I feel the loss of 1 thousand men and I know I am dramatic. You were never meant to be a tease but you fill mountains upon mountains of imagery in my sleep.
And yes, we are all supposed to be alone. Come in that way and leave the same they say. But,
I came in so close to you. Our fingers criss crossed, X marks the bloody spot, we can't get them to link together now, to set time straight.
Remember in the young days, (still younger than we are now) when swings meant marriage and tag meant love and sweaty kisses on the cheek.
I guess you're IT! But don't let me catch you.
(I won't)
And I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Life lost and separate we may fall, in pieces of thin string.